Tuesday, February 27, 2018

Damning revelations

So we (David Lappin, Daragh Davey and I) are in Rozvadov for the confusingly titled German Millions, and we have booked a cheap but odd little hotel (no reception, no employees, lots of signs saying when breakfast was but no actual breakfast place we can find: we got the keys from an unattended safe in a garage) a couple of miles away, but in a different country.

Daragh and I bust around the same time so we catch a cab back to the hotel. The triple room we booked turns out to be a double bed and a single. As the least comfortable among us with his own sexuality Daragh immediately calls dibs on the single, and encounters no opposition as myself and Lappin have often been forced to share a bed on away trips without any embarrassment.

That was, however, before Lappin's baby son was born. I was about to find out that Hunter's appearance into the world of Lappin had changed something in one of the best and most doting Dads I know.

Daragh and I drifted off to sleep confident that Lappin would find his own way to his side of the bed. Our confidence was not misplaced: I woke up in the middle of the night to find Lappin not only there, but looming over me with the friendliest smile I'd ever seen on his face. He was just staring at me, but seemed inordinately pleased to be doing so.

I'm not going to lie: I was a little creeped out.

"Um....everything ok Dave?"
Big beam.
"Ah yeah. How are you, you big pet?"
"I'm ok but....um.......are you ok?"
"Ah, aren't you just the cutest thing ever!"
He went on beaming down at me, then the smile turned to confusion.
"Oh. I thought you were Hunter. That's the side of the bed he sleeps on"

Me and Hunter: can you spot the difference? His Dad has trouble

As I drifted back to sleep I counted not sheep but lucky stars that I hadn't chose the other side to sleep on. Who knows what I'd have had to contend with if I woke up to find David mistaking me for his girlfriend Saron.

David had bust too, and after surveying our options in the little border village of Waidhaus, we decided there was no reason to hang around longer, so back to Prague with us for the day. We were scheduled to interview Griffin Benger for the Chip Race, and David was wondering if the Internet would be sufficiently reliable when he noticed that for a relatively modest fee we could upgrade and get premium wifi thrown in.

The girl looked at us a little warily, apparently more used to couples taking the upgrade as a romantic gesture.

"It's a double bed"
"Great. The wifi is good right?"
"Ok. Because we have a bit of recording to do"

The girl's face registered surprise, before deciding it was none of her business what consenting adults got up to or recorded in that double bed.

After dropping our bags we went for a quick walk around with Daragh and Sameer, before heading back alone to the hotel to interview Griffin. On the way, David decided to pop in to Aldi and buy as many boxes of powdered baby food as we both could carry, because it was a Euro cheaper than back in Malta.

As we staggered through hotel reception with the boxes of baby food and baby food only towards the lift to our room, I couldn't help but wonder what the girl at reception was thinking


That is just brilliant Dara, had a good cackle at you and Lappins antics. Looking forward to seeing him at dinner tomorrow night for sure ;)

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